Friday 3 April 2020

LOCKDOWN. WEEK 1

24th - 31st Mar 2020




Well, this 'controlavirus' (as I have come to call it) has really put the kybosh on any travel plans for the near, and perhaps distant, future. What a bollocks! Semi-confined to barracks in a small town where many of the population have been terrified into a cowed and submissive state, life has become rather tedious. Frankly, I would not particularly mind if I got it! The chances are that, for a fit (ish) person, it would be no worse than normal seasonal flu, a malady that has been almost entirely unreported on this year, even though the death toll from it (seasonal flu and pneumonia) in March 2019 was over 2,000 and nobody seemed to flap about that. I would then be immune to it. Bring it on! I note that Sweden has taken a rather different stance and is not having a lockdown, or a very limited one. It will be interesting to see how that works out at the end of the day.

An ex-colleague of mine who lives in Vietnam tells me that they have had no reported Covid 19 deaths and that in a country with a population of 97 million which borders China! Not sure whether to believe it, but the Vietnamese took the early precaution of cancelling all flights and other transport into and out of the country, hence no foreign tourists, which may be the reason. Therefore all their tourist based businesses are going tits up.

We are being flooded by non-stop contravirus 'news' (the TV news shows nothing else), all rather gloomy, hysterical and weepy with endless statistics and contradictory 'expert' advice, some of which is pure guesswork resulting in a nervous, indeed terrified, public. They can't even begin to assess how many people have got it or have had it as very few have been tested. It will be interesting to see how restrictions will continue after this pandemic is deemed to be over. Governments now have the perfect excuse to impose all sorts of rules and 'monitor' us 'in the interest of our health, safety and security' ad infinitum. Rather like those confounded announcements at many transport hubs which tell you "CCTV cameras are in operation for your safety and security". Only partly; it's mainly to watch you and catch you doing something naughty. I wonder how long it will be before we are legally obliged to have government monitored CCTV cameras fitted in every room of our homes for our 'safety and security', of course. Big Brother is knocking at the door!

Anyway, most shops and all restaurants, cafés and pubs in my town have shut down and there are endless queues outside (and it was freezing cold out there) the supermarket and Boots the Chemist. I had to collect some pills from Boots and realising there would be a queue down the high street I took with me a fold-down chair and a newspaper (luckily found one) to read. Just as well as I was in the queue for 1hr 50mins (including a 40 minute period when they closed!). I'm told that was better than average. It was breezy and very cold outside. By the time I got into the shop my newspaper had all but disintegrated, my hands had turned blue and I thought I had hypothermia. If the virus doesn't get you then standing (or in my case sitting) in these queues will!

The local Coop, Tesco, Post Office and chemist are still open albeit with reduced hours. Fortunately they are in easy walking distance. I think we are allowed to go on one shopping trip for 'essential' items only! Who is to a) check what we have bought and b) what is considered an 'essential' item? I suppose the police can now arrest you for buying an Easter egg, of which the Coop is well stocked...along with cat food. We might be forced to eat that when all else has run out. The tuna variety looks quite appealing.

There are long queues ouside Tesco (one out, one in) stretching around the car park, but none at the Coop which is short, or out, of many items but has enough essentials and still plenty of (essential) booze. We all have to stay 2m apart but that is rule fairly liberally applied. When you get to the till the staff are only 3 ft away, gloveless and maskless and don't seem particularly worried about it, and neither am I. Thankfully very few people have been reduced to wearing face-masks which, as we are told, offer no protection anyway. There are, amusingly, some 'concerned' individuals who sculk around with hankerchiefs, scarves or soggy paper tissues held over their faces. They look frightened. Fat lot of good that will do them...or anyone else as I saw one woman put her snot-ridden tissue on the check-out counter.

We are also told that we can take one piece of excercise a day, ie a run, walk or bicycle ride, and now not allowed to drive to uninhabited spaces to do it. Why one? Why the no-drive rule? What is the logic there? Having said that I may be forced to go on a 'run' (or stagger in my case) as I don't have a bike or dog to walk and would certainly not countenance doing more than one in any event. I was going to say who would notice if I did go on a daring two runs? In fact I have been told that these restrictions have given scope and great pleasure to our vibrant community of curtain-twitching meddlesome ratbags to snitch on us to the police. I can believe that!


So how have I organised my lockdown (or lockup) during Week1? Well first I made a list of 'things to do' (TTD) which have needed to be done for ages. It was quite a long list. I then fell into a sort of daily routine:

1. Get up late and have a light breakfast.
2. Listen to Pop Master on the radio.
3. Reassess and amend my list of things to do (TTD).
4. Walk down to the town and call in on a friend who runs a hardware shop (stays open) en-route for a morale boosting chat. I bought a large tin of outdoor paint for my garden fence on Day 1.
5. Coop to shop. Newspaper, bottle of wine and other essential items.
6. Post Office as required.
7. Walk back home via the hardware shop.
8. Have a look at my TTD list.
9. Answer various e-mails and, especially, look at hundreds of WhatsApp messages which have come pinging onto my phone that has come to sound like a ship's Asdic echo finder in my pocket. Ping ping ping! Most of these WhatsApp are a waste of time but some are interesting/amusing/informational so you feel obliged to trawl through them all just in case . The world has gone WhatsApp mad and I'm so glad I have nothing to do with Facebook, Twitter etc.
10. Have lunch.
11. Read the newspaper.
12. Go on 'run'. Very slowly.
13. Shower.
14. Think about mowing the lawn or painting the garden fence.
15. Revise my TTD list.
16. Do the crossword.
17. TV. I have, as of writing, given up watching the TV non-news.
18. Supper and wine.
19. TV again. Very little worth watching.
20. Read a book. Presently 'Plague' by Albert Camus.
21. Check my TTD list.
22. Go to bed.

I will send another inspiring report after Week 2.

PS. I have become allergic to that abominable valediction in vogue at the moment; "Stay safe"! It's ghastly! Even more irritating than shop assistants who command you to "Have a good day"!

As I think Mr Shakespeare more amusingly and aptly said "a plague be on you and your household". 

2 comments:

  1. Your lucky you can leave the house Matthew, I daren't take the risk with the lady wife cancer ridden as she is.But isolation doesn't bother me, I prefer my own company a lot of the time, I've just taken delivery of The Templars by Dan Jones, I suppose you could call them the Hereford Hooligans of their day , with a Crucifix, but i won't get to it yet, as I'm stil reading the Death of Kings by Bernard Cornwell (7 Volumes).' I suppose there's a lot I could do around the house, but truthfully I can't be arsed! onward,Michael.

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  2. I sympathise with you! Like you, I am happy to keep my own company but need to do some exercise. Sounds like you have plenty to read. Hope you have a Kindle! Good luck...and I won't use that terrible valediction Stay Safe! Ugh. I think we are old enough to know how to do that! Love to Mrs Brogs.

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